growing, of a different kind

for thirteen weeks now
I've been growing a little one
and already so in love with this
child to be born in my favourite season
which is autumn,
days after my birthday (maybe)

oh what blessing,
a babe for winter hibernating
swaddled close and tenderly
waiting for spring to come again -

it feels good to be telling you,
the past few months I have struggled
with the constant sea-sick feeling
and tiredness,
which seemed so mild the first time round
but maybe my body was telling me
it's different every time
or there's so many other things to navigate
(a move, a farm to grow, a business course, a toddler)
or it's a wee girl, perhaps -

this week I feel more myself,
some pleasant surges of inspiration
to create things, to get organised,
to stretch my body and enjoy eating -

I came across these dainty star flowers
in my friends garden,
I was taken with their beauty
in being so simply formed and tiny -
like all life really,
that starts small
and grows and grows...